A Modest Proposal

I wish I had one of those cartoon-handed "Return to Sender" stamps, preferably in red ink, so when my Federal Tupperware comes in the mail (you know, the one that contains my Piece of the Pie), I could cartoonishly rubber stamp it and zing it right back the way it came. But who am I kidding, I'll never have a stamp like that. I can't afford one.

The whole "stimulus" idea is a diversion, of course. As is explained here (albeit in slightly different words), all good diversions are based on misunderstanding (a.k.a. "deception"):

It seems that Washington wants us to believe that they have some magic machine that can turn up $150 billion in new assets without anyone having to do anything to make these assets appear. One wonders, then, why we need to wait until a recession to stimulate the economy. Why not magically create hundreds of billions every day, and not just for this country but for the entire world? Why are we holding back?

Indeed. Let's allow this logic to continue for a bit, because it gets better. Along these same lines, our Mr. President offered us the following wisdom (as archived here on MSNBC, about four minutes in):

"I think actually the spending on the war might help with jobs, because we're buying equipment and people are working. I think this economy is down because we built too many houses."

If you're asking yourself to believe that these are his words... Look, I can't make this stuff up. Following this simple logic to its sublime conclusion, we should not only attempt to really stimulate the economy by blowing up as many countries as we can, we should also start dropping bombs on our own houses. No, really, this is a good idea. Think of all the jobs the rebuilding would create! Those pesky houses are like rabbits anyway - first you have two, then before you know it there's an entire development.

But I digress, and painfully so.